The joys and challenges of parenthood are unique and special. There’s nothing like cradling your newborn infant in your arms for the very first time. But it can also be overwhelming as your baby changes your relationship with your partner, your self-image, your sleep and sex life. So here are some ideas just for partners and valuable things you can do every step of the way through your pregnancy journey.
Just Pregnant: 1st Trimester
Congratulations!
You’ll be feeling very excited and perhaps a little apprehensive not knowing quite what to expect – apart from a baby.
A lot is changing and you need to get ready for the months ahead.
Things you can do to help:
- Plan to attend every medical appointment (if your work permits) with your partner so that you’re both involved and can support each other.
- Go for walks or do yoga with your partner, be conscious of eating a healthy diet together and cutting out alcohol and cigarettes.
- Find out about paternity leave arrangements, so that you can take time to help out after baby is born.
- Be aware of all your partner’s physical symptoms and make allowances for her being more tired and lacking in energy.
- Take over more of the household chores.
- The hormones of pregnancy can cause emotional instability. Now’s the time to listen, empathise, understand and be as supportive as you can.
Keeping Healthy: 2nd Trimester
This is a wonderful part of the pregnancy, as you may have found out if you’re having a boy or a girl and can start to feel the baby move.
Your partner will also have regained more energy during these vital mid-term weeks.
Things you can do to help:
- Read all you can find about labour, childbirth and your growing baby.
- Research antenatal classes you can both take at the hospital.
- Ask your partner if they’d like a back massage.
- Help out even more with the household chores.
- Spend as much time together as you can, before baby arrives
Preparing for the new arrival: 3rd Trimester
By now your partner is feeling ‘very pregnant’.
She may not be sleeping well and may be experiencing backaches whilst dealing with the excitement of preparing for the new arrival, and you can really help her to relax and take it easy.
Things you can do to help:
- Attend antenatal classes together.
- Plan and discuss your role at the delivery.
- Consider a “babymoon” – a short holiday away where the two of you can enjoy quality time together before baby arrives.
- Know the phone number of the delivery suite.
- Set up the nursery at home.
Any time now: 37+ Weeks
Your baby could arrive any day.
Now’s the time to make sure everything’s ready for the newest member of your family.
Things you can do to help:
- Find out where to park at the hospital, especially if there is an emergency.
- Make sure the freezer is stocked with meals for the coming weeks.
- See that the hospital bag is within easy reach.
- Have a back-up plan in case your partner goes into labor early and you need someone to look after your other children.
Once Your Baby Is Born
Your long-awaited baby arrives in a rush of emotion and potentially after a long and tiring labour where you’ve seen your partner go through a tremendous physical experience.
Hold your baby as soon as possible and savour the miracle that is the birth of your child. They’ll recognise your voice from inside the womb. Savour the miracle that is the birth of your child. You’ll be feeling incredible joy and may also be overwhelmed with the responsibility of caring for the tiny new life you’ve both created. Here’s a brief survival guide just for you.
Things we can do to help:
At this time, we’d like to offer you lots of support as you adjust physically and emotionally to having a beautiful little newborn in your family.
- Download the fantastic ‘Quick tips for Dads’ iOS app.
- Read ‘Baby Love’ by Robin Barker.
- Find other new Dads and share ideas.
- If you feel you are not coping emotionally, call me or your GP.
- For practical ways to feel supported after the birth and help if you need it, click here.
- How is Dad going? – http://www.howisdadgoing.org.au/
Things you can do:
- Allow your partner to sleep by doing the early feed.
- Find an infant massage class you can all attend – it’s a wonderful way to soothe your baby.
- Learn how to bathe, feed, hold and comfort your baby, as well as how to change a nappy.
- Take baby out in a pram or baby carrier for some bonding and to give your partner time out.
- Take care of household duties to help your partner rest or sleep.
- Prioritise affection and quality time with your partner and talk about your feelings.
- If possible, have time off after the baby and look after your own health so you can look after your family.
- Take lots of photos and videos – your baby will change and grow fast.
- Have fun, enjoy being a proud new Dad and plan all the things you and your child will do together in the future. Congratulations!